How the Snape Tried the Steal Christmas
by Moony3
Summary: I wanted to write a chrismas story, since it's almost christmas! It's basically How the Grinch stole christmas, with a twist. Set back in MWPP time, and it has a suprise ending! please r/r!


Here you go, it's your Christmas present from me! Hope you like it! I know some  
of the lines are wrong, but oh well, it has the basic story line, except for the ending!  
-Moony :)  
  
J.K. Owns it!  
  
  
How The Snape Tried to Steal Christmas  
  
  
iIn a very large castle,  
  
most like the ones kings and queens live in,   
  
lived two school houses,   
  
who hated each other.  
  
The Gryffindors in their common room, all nice a cozy, liked Christmas a lot./i  
  
  
"Sirius!" Lily Evans yelled from on top of her ladder.   
  
"At your service Lady Lily." The long black-haired boy named Sirius Black said, bowing.  
  
"Help me please." Lily said.  
  
"Sure thing." He said helping her put up a very tall Christmas tree.  
  
Just then, the commonroom portrait swung open and who happened to come in? Well James  
Potter and Remus Lupin, their faces lit up with a grin.  
  
"Their smiling, this can never be good." Lily said wrapping garlin around Sirius neck.  
  
"Sirius what, may I ask, are you doing?" Remus said looking at his friend who was now wrapped  
up in garlin with little Christmas balls hanging off him.  
  
"Can't you tell Remus." James said sounding amused.  
  
"No." Remus said.  
  
"Good, because neither can I, Sirius what are you doing?" James said still wearing his devilish  
grin.  
  
"Helping your girlfriend decorate this Christmas tree." Sirius said from under the garlin.  
  
"Lily, it looks like you did a better job decorating Sirius than that tree." Remus said laughing.  
  
"Opps." Lily said giggling. "Sorry Siri, hey if it makes you feel better you make a cute Christmas  
tree."  
  
"Love you too Lily." James said, putting on his puppy face.  
  
"Jamsie!" She said hugging him and kissing him.  
  
"Anyway." Sirius said as Lily and James broke apart their kiss. "Where have you been?"  
  
"Take your decorations off, and we'll tell you." Remus said.  
  
So Sirius did, and they sat down, and James, the leader some may call him, spoke addressing the  
other Marauders.  
  
"We've been around checking the other common rooms, to see if any come close to betting  
Gryffindor in the decorating contest, and I am pleased to tell you, ours is the best." He said with a  
smile as the Gryffindor common room cheered.  
  
"What does the Slytherin common room look like?" Peter Pettigrew asked.  
  
"Well, it looks exactly the same." James said.  
  
"They haven't even put so much as a light up." Remus said.  
  
"That figures, I mean most of the Slytherins hate Christmas." Sirius said.  
  
"Well, some don't and some do, but our best friend Snapes hates it the most." Peter said grinning.  
  
~*~  
  
iBut the Slytherins who's common room was just north of Gryffindor's did not./i  
  
  
"I hate Christmas." Snape spat, pacing around in the common room. "I hate everything about it,  
all the presents, all the laughter, all the fun."  
  
  
iNo one knew why Snape hated Christmas so much, some say that it was because his robes  
didn't fit right, or that his black shoes we're too tight, but the Gryffindors say that Snape's heart  
was two sizes too small./i  
  
  
"But what I hate most, about this Christmas holiday, is the cheer, all that Gryffindor spirit and  
cheer! Especially from those no good Marauders." He hissed. "It's the same thing every year, the  
Marauders will open their gifts, all those pranks they will receive, and they will use them on  
unsuspecting Gryffindors like me."  
  
"And then it's the worst part of all, all those Gryfindors, will come together, and they'll sing." He  
said.  
  
"I must do something now." He said still pacing. "I must stop this Christmas from coming, but  
how?"  
  
  
iThen Snape got an idea, an awful idea, Snape got a brilliant, awful idea./i  
  
  
"I will disguise myself as one of them." He said. "Yes thats what I'll do, and I'll steal their  
presents, and they'll cry boo, who, who."  
  
  
iSo Snape pulled his greasy hair back into a pony tail, dressed in different cloths, and came out  
of his common room looking like a fellow Gryffindor, the one they call Sirius Black./i  
  
  
~*~  
  
"Your a mean one..Mr. Snape." A overly drunk Remus Lupin sang.  
  
"You real are a heel!" James Potter joined in, also drunk.  
  
"Your as cuddly as a cactus.." Sirius Black, the most drunk out of all of them sang.  
  
"Your as charming as an eel!!!" Peter Pettigrew sang before they all finished with..  
  
"MR SNAAAAPPPE! YOUR A BLACK BANANA WITH A....GREASY BLACK PEEL!!!!"  
  
They all collapsed in a fit of laughter at they end.  
  
"MARAUDERS!" Professor MaGonagall yelled.  
  
"Hey guys look, it's McGonagall, HI PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL!!" Sirius yelled waving.  
"Listen to our song."  
  
"Your a monster, Mr. Snape." Sirius began. "Your heart's an empty hole"  
  
"Your brain is full of spiders, you've got garlic in your soul, Mr. Snape." James continued.  
  
"I wouldn't touch you with a thirty-nine-and-a-half-foot pole!" Remus finished.  
  
"Did ya like it?" Peter said. "Guys I don't think she liked it."  
  
Professor McGonagall did not like it, she also didn't like it when the Marauders we're up at two in  
the morning singing very loudly.  
  
"That is enough, detention for all of you! Next Tuesday since it's Christmas." She said sternly.  
  
"Ok." Sirius said now waving goodbye. "Thank you Professor, and Cerry Mistmas."  
  
"Cerry Mistmas." All the Marauders repeated happily, waving goodbye to the Professor.  
  
"Alright, you four." Lily said from up the stairs. "Off to bed, now."  
  
"Yes sir Lily-Dilly!" James said saluting her like a soldier.  
  
Lily just sighed as the four drunks made their way upstairs.  
  
~*~  
  
Meanwhile Snape crept to the Gryffindor common room, but remembered one thing, he didn't  
know the password from the portrait to swing. (A/N open not the type of dance)  
  
The portrait how yawned and looked at Snape.  
  
"Mr. Black why are you up so late." The Fat Lady asked, knowing it was a stupid question.  
  
"Er..." Snape said.  
  
"Drunk again are you?" She asked sounding amused. "And you don't know the password right?"  
  
Snape nodded.  
  
She sighed.   
  
"Alright the password is Gryffindor Cheer." She said.  
  
"Gryffindor Cheer." Snape spat out, that was something he did not want to say.  
  
So Snape walked in and looked at all the decorations, and laughed at the fact that they'd all be  
gone by tomorrow.  
  
He stole almost every last one until he heard a noise, that sounded like the growl of a werewolf.  
  
"Oh man do I have a hangover, Sirius is that you?" It was Remus.  
  
"Er...." He said, hey it worked once before, but this was a marauder,and Snape wished he'd drop  
dead.  
  
Remus gave him a puzzling look.  
  
"It's so dark in here, don't you think, I can't even see." He said lightly. "What are you doing."  
  
It may have been dark, but Remus was good at lying, he knew it was Snape and he knew what he  
was hiding.  
  
"I'm just.." Snape said, not knowing what to say. "Taking this Christmas tree to er..the girls dorm,  
I think it would look, nice there."  
  
Remus laughed.  
  
"What?" Snape asked.  
  
"Oh come off it Snape." He said still laughing.  
  
"How did you know it was me, I thought it was too dark to see." Snape said sounding alarmed.  
  
"Lets just say I have very good eyesight, and Sirius doesn't have greasy hair, and he wouldn't  
dress like that, now if you had a leather jacket...." He said grinning. "But what to do with you."  
  
Snaped gulped.  
  
"I could leave you Sirius and James." Remus said. "Or I could take care of you myself."  
  
"What could you possibly do to me?" Snape asked.  
  
"Oh see me when the moon is full and I can do a whole lot." Remus said calmly.  
  
"What's that supposed to mean?" Snape asked a note of panic in his voice.  
  
Remus laughed again.  
  
"Nothing, Snape, nothing." Remus said. "Now return our things, to back where they came, and I'll  
think about letting you go."  
  
Snape did as Remus said.  
  
"Now stay here, don't you move, I have to get the other Marauders." Remus said.   
  
Snape grinned.  
  
"You know what." Remus said turning back to Snape. "I don't trust you..."   
  
BANG! Snape was put inside a a big box and it magically wrapped itself.  
  
"Oh I'm sure Sirius will like this present." Remus said grinning.  
  
"LET ME OUT OF HERE!" Snape yelled.  
  
"Hmm... let me think about this one....." Remus said pretending to think. "No."  
  
And with that he turned and walked up to his dorm to get his fellow Marauders.  
  
~*~  
  
"Now what did you drag us out of bed for Remus?" A tired James said.  
  
"Yeah I was having a very good dream." Sirius said rubbing his eyes.  
  
"This better be good Remus." Peter said.  
  
"Oh it is, look." He said showing them the present.  
  
"It's a present." James said staring at it.  
  
Remus sighed.  
  
"Open it." He said grinning.  
  
"OH! CAN I OPEN IT CAN I?" Sirius said dancing around like he was five years old.  
  
"Yes go on." Remus said and Sirius opened it.  
  
"Remus! Oh how did you know!" Sirius yelled grabbing Snape by the collar and picking him up.  
  
"What is it?" Peter asked.  
  
"My very own Snape!" Sirius said in enjoyment. "Now I can punch him and kill him whenever I  
like."  
  
"Let me go it idiot." He said struggling to get out of Sirius grip.  
  
"And how did you manage to capture Snape, Remus?" James asked very amused.  
  
"He did it himself, found him stealing all our things." Remus said.  
  
"Is that so?" Sirius said. "Don't like Christmas do you Snape?"  
  
"If you must know, no I don't." Snape said.  
  
"Well guys." James said grinning. "I think we should give Snape a little Christmas Cheer, what do  
you think?"  
  
The Marauders grinned, and nodded, and Snape gulped.  
  
~*~  
  
"MERRY CHRISTMAS!" Remus yelled into the microphone, it was the Gryffindors Christmas  
party for the ones who stayed, and the Marauders, who had their own band, were the  
entertainment.  
  
Remus was the lead singer of the band and he was good at what he did. Sirius played guitar,  
James was drums, Peter was keyboard and Lily was keyboard and harp when they needed it.  
  
"We have a special treat for you today." Remus said as all the Gryffindors gathered round. "I  
think all you muggel-borns will like it."  
  
"Your a mean one, Mr. Snape." Remus began to sing, and the whole Gryffindor common room  
burst into laughter as Sirius brought Snape out.  
  
His cloths and hair and skin were all green so he looked like the Grinch.  
  
"You really are a heel, your a cuddly as a cactus and as charming as an eel, Mr Snape!" He sang.  
"Your a black banana with a...greasy black peel!"  
  
The Gryffindors exploded with applause and laughter.  
  
"Thank you." Remus said grinning.   
  
"And" Sirius said into his microphone. "A special thanks to Snape!"  
  
"We couldn't have done it with out you buddy!" James said happily.  
  
The party went on, and they eventually let Snape go, changed him back, and sent him to his  
common room.  
  
Sirius protested, but since it was christmas, they decided to be nice.  
  
"Merry Christmas Snape!" The Marauders yelled as he left.  
  
Snape grinned to himself, he'd get them next year. 


End file.
